Building Authentic Relationships: How to Get to Know Each Other on a First Date

Good news: In many places, COVID restrictions are finally lifting. Social interaction can be scary. However, if you’re like many people, the restrictions of the pandemic have made you eager to get out there and trying to meet new folks.

A first date is always nerve-wracking. Not only do you have to deal with the complex world of social interaction, but there’s also the added stress of knowing you and the person are attracted to each other.

Thankfully, it’s not as hard as it seems. A good first date will help you build authentic relationships and lead to lasting partnerships. This article will walk you through all you need to know about being you on your first date.

Open Yourself Up

The first thing to know about dating is that you have to come into it with the correct mind frame. If you spend the whole time trying to figure out what the other person wants — you’re only going to stress yourself out.

It’s impossible to know what someone else is thinking and what they want. Instead, focus on what you can do to make yourself comfortable and authentically present yourself.

Make sure you’re honest about anything going on in your life. Rather than hiding your disability, let the person you’re dating know any limitations you might have when they come up. Being the real, you are the best option when it comes to first dates.

If the person you’re dating also has a disability, this can encourage them to open up about theirs. After this, you’ll be able to move forward in a much more open and honest position, knowing you have a shared experience.

If the person does not have a disability, that’s alright too. They may open up about other things or just simply understand more of your personhood. These things can only help you build a relationship.

Take it Slow

Don’t feel the need to rush into serious talk right away. Express yourself, but try not to think of expressing yourself as a “goal.” Try your hardest to enjoy the moments as they’re happening and open up to your date partner.

Many people rush into inauthentic relationships that don’t last because they take their first dates too fast. They come trying to impress and end up getting swept away in their perception of the other person. Instead, try to navigate the day in a way that emphasizes your communication; this will assure that you’ll build a relationship that lasts.

Don’t Force It

It’s important not to go on a first date looking for a relationship. Instead, look at it as an opportunity to meet someone that you may end up in a relationship with.

Going into a date with the goal of a relationship in find is another way you can wind up rushing into something that you’re not ready for. The importance of sharing the real you and presenting yourself authentically can not be stressed enough.

Choose a Good Location

When you go on a first date, make sure you choose a good, safe, low-pressure location. Romance movies have thrown all sorts of ideas into the ring — but they’re not always the best for real life. Let’s take a look at a good and bad option for a first date.

Movie Theater — Bad

First of all, we know: What could be more stereotypically first-date than seeing a movie? They’re a common location for first dates for sure, but they’re not a very good one.

A movie theater is bad because it means you’re stuck sitting next to the person (you won’t be able to see their face) in a place where you’re not expected to talk for hours. Sure, you can talk before the movie starts, but after it’s over, it’s customary for people to give their opinions on the film. Comparing and contrasting opinions on a film isn’t always the best thing for a first date.

Coffee Shop — Good

A coffee shop is one of the best options out there for casual dating. At a coffee shop, you’re not expected to buy any expensive meals, and you won’t have a waiter interrupting your conversation. You generally can stay for as long or short of a time as you want

Coffeeshops as locations are synonymous with ideas, conversations, and new friendships. If you’re worried about safety, they’re a great option, too, since most are open during the day. There isn’t a better neutral place for a first date than a coffee shop.

Make Things Easier For Yourself

At the end of the day, succeeding in your first dates comes down to making things easier for yourself. Consider choosing an online disability dating app so both you and your partner know completely what you’re getting into.

When you’re on your date, always ask yourself if you’re asking good questions or listening well. These are two things you can easily do at any moment to increase the quality of the date.

Don’t worry if you’ve let some time go by without asking a question. If you’ve noticed it’s been a bit, look for your next opportunity!

The best thing you can do on a first date is to help yourself.